Monday, June 8, 2009

I had quite a whirlwind weekend. Saturday morning I drove to Yuba so I could go to two of my close friends birthday parties. The first one was Saturday night and the second one was yesterday at noon. I was pretty pooped last night when I got home.
I count myself very lucky, I don't know how many people are lucky enough to have such a close group of friends as I do. Two of them I've known since I was in pre-school and kindergarten, the rest of them I've known since 7th grade and high school.
I love my friends dearly and they have been so very supportive since August. I don't know how I would have gotten through everything without them, all of them, even the guys.
I will have to say though that yesterday was for some reason, a little tough for me. Through no fault of my friends of course, it's all me. It's sometimes tough to be around a bunch of couples. Yesterday was one of those days. I don't have cute married stories to share, and if I share ones from when I was with B I feel a little pitiful. I don't have someone to kiss me on the head while I'm talking to someone else, or someone to rub my back while standing together having a conversation with someone.
This whole journey has been exactly that, a journey. There have been ups and downs and everything in between. Yesterday I had an unexpected down. When I got back to my parents house to throw my stuff in the car and get on the road I fell apart a little and my dad was there to give me a hug, thank goodness for that!
I cried myself almost all the way back to San Jose. Not necessarily with sadness, just with a mix of emotions that included love for my friends and my family for helping me get through what has been an up and down ride.
This last chapter might be tough, it might not be, who knows. Thank you to all of you who have helped me get to this point in one piece.

2 comments:

Dana said...

I know the feeling you talk about looking around at everyone else having what you want - it can be said even when married. I always try and tell myself to be happy with what I have - easy to say and not easy to always do. You are on the road to recovery and doing a great job if I do say so myself. Good luck on your journey.

Dana said...

I know the feeling you talk about looking around at everyone else having what you want - it can be said even when married. I always try and tell myself to be happy with what I have - easy to say and not easy to always do. You are on the road to recovery and doing a great job if I do say so myself. Good luck on your journey.